One reader makes a tongue-in-cheek suggestion that Pakistani Prime Minister Nawaz Sharif, currently in Britain, wants to help the Brits overcome their problems after the Brexit vote by becoming their prime minister!
Dear Pupel of Burtania. I am Nawaz Sharif, better known as Mian Sahb, VVVIP from Pakistan and prime minister, elected three times with bhari mandate. I am in London. I see your prime minister David Kamran said he resign. Kamran foolish. Should no resign; don’t leave kursi; lots of money in kursi. Ask Zardari.
But I here to help; lots of experience as prime minister. Thrice elected with bhari mandate. I offer services to Burtania. Hssein and Maryam also help; both very talented (make little joke about Hssein!). Maryam little silly with tweets but pretty girl, like Diana Princess. Now you can have Maryam Princess!
Shabazoo say will marry Theresa May. Bring baraat to House of Commons with band baja and lots of biryani. Also bring nihari. You not know nihari? Nice food, lots of ghee; make you strong.
Will promote exports. Send all machinery to Ittefaq Foundaries, melt and make lots of saryia. Earn dollars, sorry pounds for Burtania and build kothis in Lahore and Raiwind. Bring money back to Burtania. Join Punjab and Burtania and make new great country Punjtania with bhari mandate man of steel as prime minister! Mian Sahb rule forever, OK?
Mian Sahb of bhari mandate